I recently found something I’d written when my baby — who is turning two next month — was just a month old, in which I lamented my impatience with my older boys when they constantly clamored to hold the baby, touch the baby, stick their fingers in the baby’s fist, smooth down the baby’s hair (I found this particularly irksome), and put their faces as close to the baby’s as possible. My constant bark was, “Back up!” with, “I need space!” sometimes added. 

I wrote about how much I hated that I had a hard time with their gestures of love for their baby brother. I realized even in the midst of it that much of my impatience was because I was desperate for personal space, due to both the demands of a newborn and the slow and difficult recovery I had after his birth — even while I loved how excited they were and always have been about a new baby, and I so much wanted them to have good memories of having another little brother. (But I only thought those things and felt those feelings when they weren’t invading my space and trying to touch the baby!)

It’s nice to see, two years later, that my hope that they would have good memories of having a baby brother seem to have come true, and continue to come true, despite all of my failings as a mother. The big boys love that baby! I’ve thought many times over the last few months that our littlest guy has brightened up this dark quarantine time with his adorable little self, and other moms I’ve spoken to who have babies, toddlers, and preschoolers have said the same.

He’s just starting to talk, and has started to make attempts to say his brothers’ names. If you want to see big boys melt, watch them realize that their baby brother is calling to them! He recently learned how to jump, and likes to jump around the room with these tiny wobby jumps. He throws his little arms in the air and throws his little body on the couch and laughs and laughs. When he’s in a good mood, he says, “Yes!” and “No!” and “Mom!” and “Dad!” in this sweet, tiny voice. He’s all about animal noises right now and imitates on cue the sounds that horses, dogs, wolves, lions, and dinosaurs make. He’s also all about big trucks, and squeals with happiness when he sees them driving by.

Lest you think he’s cute and cheerful all the time, I do have to say that he’s one of my more high-maintenance children, and likes to scream and tantrum as well. He’s been acting like a two-year-old for months now, which makes things more challenging for me, but his brothers don’t have to deal with that side of him too much, so his reputation as Cutest Baby Brother Ever is intact. Sometimes they (and I!) even laugh when he’s mad, because it’s hilarious seeing this tiny person trying so hard to pitch a fit. He doesn’t like it when any of the others are sitting with me, or even when my husband and I are holding hands—he frowns a funny little frown and comes running over yelling, “Dop! Dop!” (“Stop!”) and tries to push the brother away or pull our hands apart.

But like I say, nothing seems to dampen the older boys’ enthusiasm for their tiny brother. When it’s not immediately obvious where he is (as when he’s down for a nap, or hasn’t yet gotten up in the morning) they ask me where he is. They’re always trying to convince him to hug them or sit with them or play with them. They look at each other and laugh when he does a hilarious thing, even if he’s demanding to have a bite of their food or insisting they move so he can sit in their spot on the couch. I do think part of this love affair is that they’re all so much older than him—the next youngest is four-and-a-half years older than him, so there are no other babies or toddlers competing for attention—it definitely makes a difference!

I’m not entirely sure what the point of all this is — just the meanderings of a mother’s mind as her youngest leaves babyhood, I guess. If I had to sum up, I’d say: babies brighten up hard times (counterintuitive as they might seem), mamas shouldn’t be too hard on themselves when they’re in the thick of it (whatever “it” happens to be at the moment), and big kids love baby siblings. At least, this has been my experience, and I’m grateful for it.

Kate and her husband have seven sons ages 15, 14, 12, 10, 8, 6, and 1. Follow her at www.facebook.com/kmtowne23, or email her at This email address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it..